Is it possible to miss the present? Introducing the concept of ‘nowstalgia’
- Norian Caporale-Berkowitz
- Mar 3
- 5 min read
Updated: Mar 5
Is it possible to miss the present? Introducing the concept of ‘nowstalgia’
💭 Nowstalgia is a common but underrecognized feeling. It describes the sentimental longing for the present moment, driven by awareness of its inherent fragility, ephemerality, or transience. Unlike nostalgia, which looks backward, nowstalgia arises while the cherished people or experiences are still here.
📝 Naming emotions can improve well-being. Research suggests that putting feelings into words helps us process and regulate them, reducing mental clutter. By coining “nowstalgia,” the author aims to give people language that clarifies and organizes a subtle emotional experience.
⚖️ Nowstalgia is plausibly helpful in moderation but harmful in excess. By comparison with research into nostaligia, the author reasons that small doses of nowstalgia can deepen gratitude, presence, and appreciation. However, when it becomes overwhelming, it can plausibly shift into fear, scarcity, and emotional dysregulation, pulling us out of the very moment we wish to preserve.
🌱 Awareness of transience can increase agency. Because the objects of nowstalgia are still present, the feeling can motivate action. It may prompt us to invest in relationships, care for our health, or protect what we value.
🚀 The concept reframes longing as a call to act. Rather than passively mourning inevitable change, nowstalgia can inspire deliberate choices that strengthen what matters. At its best, it transforms anxiety about loss into gratitude, presence, and intentional preservation.
On a recent trip to San Francisco, a disconcerting billboard caught my eye:
“Everyone is ready for AI, except you.”
The billboard, strategically positioned to spike cortisol for anyone entering the city, captures our current zeitgeist: A dozen issues ranging from AI to politics to climate change remind us daily that the world we know and love is evolving at a dizzying pace.
With the ominous billboard looming above, I found myself experiencing a sentimental feeling of longing – for the present. Can’t our current reality linger just a bit longer before it slips away? This feeling, a wistful longing for a moment we still have but are afraid to lose, is one I know well. After my father passed in 2015, I felt this feeling for several years each time I would say goodbye to my mother. With the reminder of life’s fragility fresh in my mind, I found myself yearning longingly for moments which in reality I still had.
This feeling of sentimentality for the present is common. It shows up at the end of vacations, when noticing how much a child or beloved pet has grown, and when seeing how much a loved one has aged. A client once recounted how she watched her mother suffer a debilitating mental health crisis, unfolding over several years. Each day, the woman longed to freeze time in the present moment, as she watched her mother slip away and be replaced by a new mother she barely recognized.
Mental health research tells us that putting our feelings into words is therapeutic. Much like a physical room, the mind can grow cluttered if, like hoarders of thoughts, we neglect to process and organize their contents. Even short journaling sessions about emotional experiences can improve both emotional health and physical functioning. What should we do then, if the words needed to describe our experiences are missing? We invent them, of course.
I rarely find a feeling I cannot name. After consulting the Dictionary of Obscure Sorrows to no avail, Google search suggested the term “anticipatory nostalgia”. Close, but not quite right. The word “nostalgia” is derived from the Greek nostos, to return home, and algos, pain. Allegedly, the word “nostalgia” was invented by Swiss doctor Johannes Hofer in 1688 to describe homesickness from being sent abroad. Fast forward to 2025, and our rapidly changing and increasingly unstable world invites a new term into our vocabulary: ‘Nowstalgia’.
Nowstalgia (noun) now·stal·gia: A feeling of sentimental longing for the present moment, due to an understanding of its inherent fragility, ephemerality, or transience.
Nowstalgia, much like its older cousin nostalgia, is a double-edged sword. In moderation, feeling nostalgic can help us reinforce our sense of identity and meaning, creating a link between who we were in the past and who we are now. Nostalgia can also create feelings of connection to others, promote resilience, and even regulate our emotions by anchoring us to our core identity in moments of stress. In contrast, it stands to reason that excessive nostalgia can lead to escapism, an avoidance of the present, and idealization of the past. These negative aspects of nostalgia, emphasized by earlier research, focus on the concern that it’s not healthy to spend too much time in the past, at the expense of the present.
Similarly, nowstalgia in moderation reminds us to be grateful and present in the current moment. It is an invitation to notice what we value, and to invest our time to savor and protect the moments or relationships we hold dear. Yet, in excess, nowstalgia pulls us out of the moment and into fear and scarcity. It can emotionally dysregulate us, and bring us into unnecessary contact with fears that are not actually present. All things are best in moderation, including nowstalgia.
Nowstalgia reminds us that the objects of our love are transient; but unlike with nostalgia, the things we feel nowstalgic about are still here. This can give us a sense of agency. My hope in providing this term – ‘nowstalgia’ – is that it may inspire you to take action to protect, or double down on, the things that you cherish and love. I know from my work as an executive coach that finding the right words to tell our stories is a huge catalyst for moving forward in both life and leadership. If this new term ‘nowstalgia’ resonates with you, it’s an invitation to take action.
Feeling nowstalgic about your aging body? See it as a call to increase exercise and preserve longevity. Feeling nowstalgic about a growing pet or loved one? It may be an invitation to be fully present in your time together. Feeling nowstalgic about the incessant pace of technological advancement? It could be an invitation to disconnect, to be in nature, and to cultivate relationships with people who share common values.
As our society evolves at a breathtaking pace, don’t simply sit back and watch. Let’s each take action to notice and amplify the things we feel nowstalgic about, so they have a greater chance of being carried into the future. At its worst, nowstalgia robs us of our connection to the present. At its best, nowstalgia gifts us presence, gratitude, and the inspiration to preserve what we love.
Author bio: Norian Caporale-Berkowitz, Ph.D. is an Executive Coach and Partner at Evolution who focuses on the Inner Game of Leadership: shifting patterns, building leadership mindsets, mastering hard conversations, growing executive presence, and navigating anxiety, burnout, and our changing world. Norian coaches C-suite and senior leaders at Notion, Glassdoor, Instacart, Adobe, and many startups. Norian holds a Ph.D. and M.A. in Psychology from The University of Texas at Austin, holds a B.A. from Brown University, and is a Tenure-Track Professor of Psychology at Baruch College in NYC. His writing has received hundreds of peer reviewed citations, been published in MIT Press and Harvard Business Review, and is featured on his Substack. Norian was a very early employee at the startup unicorn Coursera and has a lifelong passion for helping people achieve their greatest potential. |
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